Stop Being A Verbal Doormat

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Stop Being A Verbal Doormat

verbal doormat

At some point in life we all have faced verbal abuse in one form or another. Don’t’ look at me weird darlings. Remember those harmless little jibes your boss took – girls are not suitable for this profile or your hubby – you are good with finances only as long as its shopping to much more serious of getting called a bitch or whore, even publically.

Yes, these so called comments come under verbal abuse since they are derogatory. And in today’s world even a stranger driving alongside you thinks he has the right to curse and call you names simply because you were in his front at a traffic signal and chose to stop the moment it turned to red from yellow rather than speeding.

I will not go into the how and why of this. Any word or statement intended to demean you and make you feel inferior is verbal abuse and there is no excuse for it. All of us have gone through it or know someone suffering.

Remember the last time your friend told you how her hubby hit her and your blood boiled and you had to control yourself from kicking him where it matters most or your maid comes all colored in the morning because her hubby chose to drink and then beat her to pulp and you advised her to leave him?

Of course you remember, we never forget our own heroics and keep patting ourselves on the back for being a feminist.

But what about the comment your boyfriend made 2 days back? Yes, that comment in the middle of the party in front of all friends that we are discussing stock markets here honey, you better go and talk to your girlfriends about shoe prices or your own brother shouting and telling you that you are ruining the family name because it being late your colleague dropped you home on his bike.

Don’t believe these are real life examples? Then what about your hubby asking you to shut up and keep quiet when you dared to ask the builder some questions about the dream home you are building together or at least you think you are?

Still not getting me? Okay, remember the leachy glare and derogatory comment the guy in metro made?

 These are just examples, everyday examples where someone with a pea sized brain decides that the one having emotions has no brains and can be shamed publicly without any consequences what so ever.

I leave it up to you to decide whether you consider it as abuse or not? Whether you take a stand or choose to ignore? Simply because I don’t have the time, energy or inclination to prove a point to someone who one being called stupid and yelled at just blame themselves for being stupid and asking for it.

May be some other day I would have the strength to pry your eyes open and make you see abuse as abuse but not today.

Till then see ya………………

Aadhya

 The doormat syndrome is all about letting others walk over you. Its about treating yourself badly. This week we are all here trying to tell each one of you ladies out there to stop being that doormat. Don’t take verbal abuse, respect for oneself begins with self respect. Don’t let anyone walk over your own self respect. Read more on how not to be that doormat with The Workplace Doormat – Is That You?Casual Crushes And Being The Marital Doormat and The insignificant errand lady.

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3 Responses

  1. Vinnie says:

    Been down this road, it takes a while to understand verbal abuse and then it needs a kick from friends and relatives to stand up and say that I am not someone you can abuse as you wish. A very strong post Aadhya. Just curious what does your name mean?

  2. shee_shee12345 says:

    Watch all the news channels that cover the stock markets yaar and you will see women there. I cant digest the kind of horrible statements that people come out with. The one angle which is even nastier is when women go around abusing other women. Its time for change. One more shot in the arm kind of article Aadhya, love you and total respect.

  3. mira says:

    Why do we choose to ignore snide sarcastic remarks???? it just eats into you… Believe me it always feels better to speak up for your self even if you are considered rude and disrespectful. At the end of the day you feel good from within.

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