Last weekend I was cleaning my wardrobe and came across this huge suitcase filled with the most beautiful saris in the world, MY saris; each one chosen carefully and prepared to wear after months of haggling with the tailors, one better than the other making choosing one to wear when needed the most difficult decision of my life. OOPS!!!! I didn’t intend to write this piece to keep gushing about my saris when I started but you see girls do get carried away when it comes to clothes.
Anyways, the reason that made me hit the keyboard is that they left me thinking. YES, my saris sent me in a deep contemplative mode for the next few hours. It’s been quite a while since I have worn one of those and as far as I can see it’s gonna remain the same. Of course they are my saris and I can wear them anytime I want but there has to be an occasion to wear all those designer ones. I can’t wear them to office. Yes, it’s wedding season again and I do get invited to a few every year.
BUT, I don’t attend them. WHY??? For the simple reason that rather than the bride or the groom, people are more interested in MY marriage. Okay, I recently turned 30 and I happily say so, even though with my looks I can pass for 24. NO, I have not started shying away from functions since I turned 30 but it’s been the case since I reached the ‘MARRIAGEABLE AGE’ which started when I was 18 maybe.
So this has been the case for as long as I remember, I go to a function (be it friends, family or neighbors doesn’t matter) and people start talking about MY marriage and even trying to find someone right then and there. WOW!!!! And as the years kept progressing and I kept on publicly declaring my age with each passing year without any feeling of guilt for being single the issue kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger till it became a full-blown crisis when I turned, OMG!!!! 30.
And since then, I have been asked numerous times about my ahem… love life or the lack of it, preferences and expectations and aspirations. And some people have gone ahead and given me a mumbo jumbo of advises ranging from how to lose weight and look younger to not keeping too many expectations as already due to AGE I don’t have many options.
And all I could do was give them a long, really long stare, roll my eyes and turn on my heels. Most of these “advisers” talked as if it’s my fault that I am still NOT married and have committed the ultimate sin by turning 30 without a HUSBAND.
Tell me yaar, just because I was turning 30 I should have accepted the idiot who thought that I should be parading in front of even his extended family members one by one in a sari before he says yes? Or now when I am 30 I should accept the MCP who starts his talks with how it’s a woman’s duty to give her earnings to her hubby and accept pocket money from him? SERIOUSLY??? You expect me to do THAT!!!!
Everywhere I go I get weird looks when people don’t see bangles, sindoor etc. etc., then they ask me just 2 questions – if I am single and my age; then starts the drama in front of me which I told you earlier about and the other one goes behind my back with people talking in hush voices and dissecting my character with all their intelligence or the lack of it.
And my answer to all that is first – I am not apologetic for being 30 and single, second – find someone who is a match to me be it looks, education or financial worth and third (which I find one of the most brilliant crops of my fertile mind) – tell them to get me a groom right then and there and refuse to move till that’s done.
Every time I am the one leaving the spot with a mischievous grin and the other person cursing me (behind my back of course) for the shameless, impudent, useless, loud mouth that I am. SERIOUSLY??????