A Better Me

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A Better Me

Looking back on the life she has led, typical married woman comes across crossroads, where she does not have an inkling of what to do next.  This simple question puts in a contemplatory mood.  Having achieved her goals, fulfilling her dreams, life comes to a standstill looking endless and boring.


So the million dollar question is what she has achieved so far.  Success in life cannot be measured in terms of wealth or a bigger house.  Reflecting on these, she can conclude one thing, that life can only be made better by becoming a better me.

1)      Instead of always thinking what you want, start thinking of other’s needs.  It can either be your family, friend or a total stranger.  You would always need another dress, shoes or another irresistibly cute handbag.  Not only providing monetary helps but spending your precious time with kids in an orphanage can bring a glow to your inner self.  Genuine generosity is when you help people by cutting into your own needs and not what you have in excess.

2)      Stop doubting yourself. Stop thinking of others opinion on how you live your life. You are what you are and not an illusion of how you are. Having confidence in yourself and doing things to your liking brings immense satisfaction.  Remember that an uncritisized life is not worth living.

 3)      One common trait which women have is losing our temper due to less tolerance.  Channeling this excess energy into something constructive will bring us peace.

4)      Self –pity is one weakness which creeps upon us and we succumb to it rather easily.  Start taking charge of your actions and eventually your life.  This positive feeling encourages us to be a better mom, daughter, wife and also a better self as a whole.

 5)      As you grow older, you become fixed in your views and habits.  There has to be an open minded attitude and you should gracefully start accepting change in the world around us and adapt accordingly.

 6)      Religion is the stabilizing factor in any person’s life. All religion propagates the same virtues and values of life.  Following one’s own religion diligently makes you conscientious person.

Taking the first step is difficult, but embarking on a journey of self-discovery, we women can recognize the chinks in our armor.  We become a stronger person by being honest with ourselves, knowing our weakness and strength will pave way for a better person. All it needs is to start inspiring change and it will happen.

Athena Shafee

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20 Responses

  1. Indrani says:

    Lot of self confidence and self discipline is required for this.
    Yes a time comes in life when it starts getting stagnant, it is good if we take the initiative to change ourselves.

    • shee_shee12345 says:

      Bang on Indrani, its for us to identify that stagnant phase in our lives and make that little extra effort to move ahead.

  2. mira says:

    a beautiful post and really good points to work on.

  3. shee_shee12345 says:

    The only way to lead a better life is if you go after the important stuff and that is how to make yourself a better person. Agree with Shafee that its a must to look into the points given above.

  4. shafiya says:

    Self discipline is most needed quality in trying to become a better you.hopefully this post post will help us fellow athenas in making the required changes in the future.

  5. Fayaz Pasha says:

    A very enlightening post Shafee. It is difficult to choose one of the best points as all of them are necessary to better a person. “Having achieved her goals, fulfilling her dreams, life comes to a standstill looking endless and boring”.

    Goals and Life’s dreams are the ones that need to be understood and recognized enabling the person to take necessary action. Just like we decide the place to visit for a picnic before we start the journey. Once the place is finalized we make all other arrangements like transportation, finance and other requirements accordingly. Similarly we need to ask ourselves:

    Do we understand and recognize the purpose of life.
    Do we have a mission or legacy to achieve in life.
    Are our values, beliefs, attitudes, actions and priorities in life aligned with the purpose of life.

    Once we are able to answer the above and align them in order, life becomes most peaceful, enjoyable and satisfying.

    It was in the news that an 80-year-old Japanese man became the oldest person to reach the top of Mt. Everest on May 23, 2013 as he worked towards achieving his life’s dream.

    • shee_shee12345 says:

      Every time I read your work, I am amazed you have a very effective way to communicate the most difficult points and that too in the easiest way. Do we understand and recognize the purpose of life. Do we have a mission or legacy to achieve in life. Apt questions and I guess we women should seriously think about this more.

  6. shafiya says:

    Actually I was relating to the life of typical married woman who after after marrying and having kids does not have a clue to what she should do next.. This is the next part in her life where she has to reassess her goals,the turning point I believe.

    • Fayaz Pasha says:

      Shafiya, your concern is very true. However, the question shouldn’t arise at that stage after having kids and marrying them as to what she should do next. If the question is pondered even before getting married or during the time of education, perhaps, she can learn some hobbies and get additional training in areas of her interest. This is the time that she will be free to learn as well as more energetic.

  7. Purba says:

    Most homemakers make their family their universe. Once their kids grow up they have no idea what to do with their lives. That’s I never tire of telling my friends to cultivate interests – be it singing, taking dance classes, gardening or teaching the underprivileged.

  8. shafiya says:

    Quite true Mr.pasha.I do appreciate your feedback and will help in changing my outlook.
    And Purba as you say most women live the lives typical to a frog in the well.Changing this will surely help her grow as an individual.

  9. Sheela Pakianathan says:

    There is no end to learning new things to make our life more exciting. As the children grow, try learn with them, learn the latest techniques like Abacus, dance, painting, stitching, cooking and so on and so forth. To be loved by your grand children, one must be a computer savvy and must know to operate the 3G cell phones with whatsapp etc.It is never to late to learn to play any musical instrument of your choice or any course of your choice whether it is religious or entertainment!!! Watch 3D movies with them, go to malls with them but don’t keep advising them unless you are asked of it and give them breathing space always!!! We will be Better Meeeeess at any age if we have a positive and an optimistic outlook!!!!

    • shee_shee12345 says:

      You have the desire to do so, but there are many who have just got tied up in the mundane routine life. Its time to break that routine and some fresh air, thoughts and fun to life. Hope you pass this message on to many of your friends and let them also become better MEEEEES.

  10. Diana says:

    Reinventing oneself always helps, whether one is a homemaker or careerwoman. In order for life to remain interesting, we need to constantly reassess our priorities and goals as time goes by and reset wherever necessary.

  11. shafiya says:

    Dear sheela and Diana ,you guys have hit the nail on the head.The need to learn is always there only the enthusiasm to do so wanes.So cultivating the need is a vital factor in the growth of a person.

  12. ayesha says:

    It is never too late to change ourselves but it is the will to do so that matters. Reading is the best hobby that one can cultivate and in addition to keeping us occupied, it keeps us in touch with the changing world. Good points to consider. Have done the thinking for us and provided the answers too. Great piece, shafi.

  1. April 1, 2014

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